After making my promise to stop yelling (which failed miserably today), I also decided to take a look at some other areas I could improve. One of them was spending more one on one time with Piggle. I really took for granted how easily he slipped into sibling-hood. He never showed any signs of regression or jealousy. In the past few weeks, though, it seems to have finally clicked. Sequel is here to stay, and she requires a lot of Mommy’s time and attention.
I spend at least an hour crying after he’s gone to bed—every. single. night. I feel so guilty. I feel the withdrawal and resentment radiating off of him, and it absolutely kills me. I wish there was a way to make him understand all of it, but even I’m having a hard time comprehending. The past year (almost to the day) has been such a shit show! There have been very few high points for both Piggle and myself.
I plan to change that.
Every week, I will be taking Piggle out on a date. Sequel will be Husband’s responsibility unless she needs to eat. I need my boy to know that, regardless of how overwhelmed, frustrated, and exhausted I am, he is my everything. Last week, we went to the toddler playplace. This week, we picked our pumpkin!
Before noticing anything else on the farm, Piggle honed in on the tractor and wagon. He’s obsessed. There were a trillion other families there, and the hayride (which didn’t have any hay on it whatsoever—lame) was filling up fast. Poor Piggle was dragged across the parking lot to the cashier, so we could pay for our ride and hop on before it took off without us.
*side note: They actually had wagon rides running every 15 minutes, but I’d rather dislocate his shoulder by running at top speed than deal with the public tantrum if we’d had to wait.
*Side-side note: I don’t actually want to maim my child—I just fucking hate tantrums.
The ride itself was mundane. Nothing exciting happened—except Piggle yelling about the cow shit for 5 minutes, but to us, that’s uneventful. It didn’t take long to get to the pumpkin patch, and Piggle went BANANAS!!!! He’s only just learned what a pumpkin is, so being new to the whole idea, it was incredibly exciting for him.
It was like watching an Oompalooma on speed. He touched probably every pumpkin in the field, claiming them all as his own. I’ve never seen anyone more confused or pumped up. He really had absolutely zero idea what the point of the whole excursion was…but he had a blast—until we found the mud, and then perfect-pumpkin hunting was abandoned. Figures.
I’m 85% sure the majority of what he’s playing in is poo.
He dicked around in the poo-dirt for 10 minutes before the farmer called us back to the wagon. Piggle was pissed that his mud bath was interrupted, but I managed to convince him to get back on the tractor with the promise of seeing even more pumpkins and hay-jumping.
Of course, it was almost nap time, and rolling in cow shit takes a lot of energy, so Piggle was pooped (no pun intended), which meant I had to carry him back through the maze of pumpkins. Not an easy feat, by the way.
We finally got back on the tractor, and headed back to the main farm area. Piggle was definitely fading fast, the excitement of it all wearing off quickly, but as soon as he laid eyes on the hay bales, he seemed to forget how exhausted he was. If the pumpkin patch turned him into an Oompaloompa on speed, it was nothing compared to how he reacted to the possibility of jumping from a precarious height into enormous piles of scratchy straw. Boys.
Honestly, it was the best part of the entire outing! He and I had a blast! I had forgotten how much fun it was! Granted, my ankles were scratched to shit, and I’m 67% sure I’ll never get all of the straw out of my ass, but he and I loved it! Who knew I could reconnect with him over piles of dry grass!
All in all, the whole thing was a success, and I highly recommend doing it with your little ones! We love being outside, and it was an amazing way to bond with my boy! And hey! We even found our pumpkin!